White
by Neo-Cooler
Summary: X3 Spoilers: Scott Cyclops Summers after his encounter with the Phoenix.


Let's make this short:

Warning #1: First fic ever.

Warning #2: Contains X-Men III spoilers

Disclaimer: The usuall stuff I guess. I don't get paid for this and the characters belong to Marvel Comics and Fox Entertainment.

Pure white.

Scott Summers was standing in a pure white hall. No, it wasn't a hall or a cube or something like that, because those things had boundaries. But this was infinitive, eternal. And although he felt like he was standing on solid ground, he knew he wouldn't be able to leave. No matter how long or fast he would run.

And after the initial denying and some screaming Scott accepted the only logic explanation for this: He was dead.

He died in the hands of his one and only true love, Jean Grey. Or to be precise he died at her hands. But he couldn't kept his mind focused on this. Accepting that he died was one thing, accepting that he died after he had been moments before so incredible happy to got her back... this was another thing.

And so he tried to distract himself by observing his surroundings, not that there was much to observe anyway.

And so he decided to take a closer look at himself just to keep his mind occupied. The first and most remarkable thing was his face or rather the thing that wasn't there. At first he couldn't believe how blind he had been not to notice that he was seeing something white. The first other color than red he had seen since his early childhood; except for the few short moments before he had been killed. And now when he could finally see, he sincerely wished he would see red again. Red like her hair. He remembered that he usually felt naked without his visor. He knew that this visor – or his special shades – had been the only thing that kept himself in check so that he wouldn't hurt the ones he cared for, the ones he had sworn to protect. But here it didn't matter anymore. No visor, no optic blasts and no red.

It was almost funny that he still longed for her after the all the things that had happened. He wouldn't even dare to count the times Storm had told him to go on with his life. She had told him this almost every day, sometimes even twice. And she even tried to set him up with someone new, like Colossus's little sister Magik for the Christmas-Party, telling him that Jean would have wanted that he would move on with his life. But he couldn't move on. He didn't wanted to leave Jean just like some memory behind. She didn't just deserved a place in his heart, she deserved his whole heart. Even after what has happened...

Here he was going again. This was dangerous ground. Time for a distraction. The clothes would probably make a good delay. So what could be said about his actual clothes? Well for one thing he wasn't wearing his black mission suit or even that kinky old blue one for that matter. And he didn't even wore his leather-jacket when he had found her at the lake. No, he was wearing something completely different, something he hadn't seen in a very long time. He had an old New York Knicks shirt on, which was in a pretty bad shape and it didn't was exactly new and fashioned, and for his pants he was wearing some simple blue old jeans, nothing special about them either. And although he hadn't wore these items in ages, he immediately remembered the time when he was wearing them. His first date with Jean Grey, at this time still known as Marvel Girl.

He clearly remembered how hurt she had been, because of this outfit. Telling him that he obviously didn't cared enough to wear something special for their date. And he remembered the following days full excuses and begging for forgiveness. But then again, how can you possibly forget an angry beautiful redhead who had thrown whole shelves at you? He honestly missed her.

And he really couldn't hate her. He couldn't stop loving her just because of this whole mess.

Scott wasn't that naive to believe that she killed him by accident, he knew that she had done it on purpose. But he also knew that it wasn't her who did this to him, and that the woman he had faced at the Alkali-Lake had been someone different. A being that used his beloved as a mere shell in order to deceive. But unfortunately this being had met maybe the only person, next to the Professor of course, who couldn't be deceived that easily, even by this perfect copy. But the moment his mind had formed the thought that this was not his Jean, who he was kissing, the imposter knew she had failed and decided to get rid of him.

And so Scott Cyclops Summers died.

He died and ended up here.

And bluntly Scott had to admit that he was slightly disappointed by this afterlife. He hadn't exactly expected a huge golden gate and harping little angels but somehow he had always hoped that there was more after the whole dying thing. And he had often dreamed about seeing his parents and his brother again. But obviously life is full of disappointments.

So he had to put up with the thing that there wasn't a better world at the end of the horizon. This couldn't be harder than to see your soul mate die in front of your eyes or to see yourself dying in her green eyes full of hatred. At least there wasn't a big red guy with a trident, horns and all the other stuff. "Yeah that's the spirit Scott. Be optimistic, even after you are dead." he told himself.

But the thing he couldn't understand was the white color of this. The great nothingness was supposed to just be black, wasn't it? And even if this was the great nothingness, why was he still here? Why couldn't he just disappear? Just vanish into thin air and that would be the end of the story. But no, he had to stay here.

He often wondered, how the others would be doing. He was aware of the fact that they could handle themselves quite well even without their leader. And Scott had to admit that he hadn't been a leader anyway since that faithful day. Back then he barked at the others for not understanding him, not giving him time to handle his grief, but now he couldn't believe how egoistic he had been and he regretted how he treated his fellow teammates and his students.

Sure he had lost Jean, the love of his live. But the other had lost someone, too. The Professor had lost Jean, one of his first students who he treated like his own daughter. Ororo had lost Jean, her best friend. Rogue, Bobby, Peter and many others had lost Jean, the idol and the living prove that you could live a normal and confident life even if you are different. And Logan had lost Jean, the only person who could tame his beast and bring he best out of him.

No, Scott never really hated Logan. Disliked him, maybe. Wanted to pummel him, because he was lusting after his girl, sure. But despite their differences, he respected Logan or rather Wolverine as valuable teammate, who would stand right next to you if the worst comes to the worst. And now that Scott was dead, he somehow hoped that Logan would look after Jean. And although the thought alone of them together as more than good friends twisted Scott's guts, he tried to accept the fact that they would most likely end up together, if the real Jean would be back gain.

And Scott was sure that the true Jean, his Jean, was still there in this body and surely she was fighting this thing with every thing she got. He almost felt sorry for the imposter thinking of what Jean might be throwing at this being this very moment.

And with the help of the Professor and the other X-Men there was no doubt that Jean would win this battle. And then she would marry Logan and they would be having at least four puppies. Like in this old-fashioned fairy tales Jean loved to read when she...

"But life is not a fairytale, Scott. You of all people should know this."

Scott snapped out of his train of thoughts. That voice. That unique wonderful voice. Had he gotten insane at last? Was he imagining things now, just to have something to do? Or was this some sort of twisted joke? A prank of a higher being, which made fun out of him?

"Come on Scott ,don't be silly."

There was is it again. He could hear it loud and clear. As if the origin of the voice was standing right behind him.

"Actually I am standing right behind you. And I have to say that I am not very happy about you ignoring me."

'Behind me? Is is possible? Maybe I should just turn around and take a look? Maybe I should just take a look... but what if it is really some twisted joke and...'

Before Scott could finish his line of thoughts, he felt two hands on his arms who quickly turned him around. And then he saw her. Jean Grey. His Jean Grey. He knew it the second he saw her.

"I guess I left you way too long on your own. But who could have guessed that..." Jean couldn't finish her sentence because of the massive bear hug she was receiving. A hug so intense that it would have made Colossus proud. But it didn't matter. Words wouldn't be appropriate in a moment like this anyway. And so she decided to simply return the hug. She really enjoyed being this close to him. But above all she was relieved that Scott didn't hate her. She had feared that he would assault her or that he would do something even worse, like simply turning away and leaving her. And when she felt something wet on her shoulder she knew that he was crying. How stupid has she been to doubt Scott's love for her?

"I... Jean...I missed...you much " Between all his sobs Scott had problems speaking. All the things he wanted her to tell, since that day, have been now released but he couldn't organize them. The thought alone of Jean here in his arms was just too overwhelming. But then a new thought aroused in his mind. A thought that crushed all the other thoughts till it was the only one left, demanding Scott's fully intention.

Jean felt that Scott slowly lost his grip on her and that he moved his head back so that he could see her directly in her eyes. And she could see in his. These handsome eyes, usually cloaked by his visor or at least his shades, were now red because all of his crying, but they were handsome nonetheless and Jean felt like she could easily get lost in them. But the expression of her boyfriend's face told her that he was trying to control his emotions again, so that he could ask a very important question to her. And she not needed to be psychic to forecast this one.

"Jean, tell me" Scott was taking a deep breath, knowing there was no easy way to do this and that he probably wouldn't like the answer "If you are here, does this mean, that you died?"

By not immediately answering his question Jean knew that she given him the answer he expected. She turned her head slightly to the left. "Yeah Scott I am dead. Logan killed me" The moment the sentence had left her mouth Jean knew she had made a mistake. Talking with Scott about Logan was always like a walk in a minefield but under this circumstances this would be even worse than normal.

Hearing Jean's confession about her own death brought all the feelings of sorrow and grief back for Scott Summers. But they were quickly replaced by pure anger and rage. 'How could this filthy little..." Scott began to scream, only to notice that he wasn't screaming at all, he could just think these things. 'Oh great, even in the afterlife she can lock my mouth with her powers. How I hate it when she does this'.

"And I hate to do this to you, well sometimes it's actually quite fun" Jean said with a small smirk "But this is the only way you will listen to me. So do you think you can push your temper down so that we could talk like civilized people?"

The expression on Jean's face told Scott that this was important to her. And when he thought about it, he couldn't quite believe that Logan should have killed Jean. 'He was in love with her, that was the problem all along.'.

Jean smiled at this:'He is so cute when he's jealous' but she preferred actual saying:"Very good. Like I said Logan killed me but he did it only because I begged him to do it in order to stop my other personalty the Pheonix. If he hadn't done it many innocent people would have died by my hands. He did what he had to do."

'Yeah that's Logan. Even by killing my girlfriend he is doing something for the greater good and is cheered by everyone, even the one he killed.' Scott thought sadly 'I only hope the Professor will teach him some manners someday'. By mentally mentioning the Professor Scott could see Jean flinch, and he noticed that her eyes were watering. 'Oh no...'

'Now he knows what I have done. After all the things I have done to him, I had to kill his surrogate father, the one man he looked up to and who he trusted completely.' Jean began to turn around so Scott wouldn't see her face. The pretty face, which was now filled with shame and disgust because of her own actions. But his right arm stopped her and with his left hand he lifted her face up so she would look directly into his eyes.

'Jean.' He began in the softest voice he could muster "I know that you didn't all those things. It was that Pheonix, who took control. This being is the one to blame.

"But I should have stopped her"

"Apparently you have stopped her, haven't you? I doubt, that even Logan would be able to kill such a powerful creature if you hadn't weakened it. I know that you fought it with all your strength and that you won because of your unbreakable spirit."

'Sometimes I wonder if he got psychic powers, too.' Jean Grey wondered and she was honestly touched because of his tender words. "Do you have the slightest idea how much I love you Scott Summers?"

At this Scott had to chuckle. How much had he missed these words? "And I love you, too, Jean Grey. And I am happy that we are finally together. At least here we have all the time of the world. Maybe even the eternity". And again Jean shifted her head to the side; obviously there was another thing going on. "Jean? Come on whatever it is I am..."

"You are not dead, Scott" Jean blurted out.

"What do you mean by 'I am not dead'?"

The look of pure confusion would be almost funny not considering the circumstances of course. "The Pheonix tried to kill you like she had done with the all the others. Just using her powers to literally cut you into pieces. But something interfered with her plan and she became furious that she wasn't able to slaughter you. And that was when she decided to lock you away."

"You mean this whole thing is just some kind of prison?"

"Well, I guess you could call it a small 'prison-dimension'", answered Jean still not looking at him.

To say that Scott was shocked by this news would be an insulting understatement. But when he looked around in this simple white dimension and when he checked his clothes again it somehow suddenly started to make sense, a little at least. "So I guess I have to thank you for saving my butt again"

"Huh?" now it was Jean's turn to be confused.

"Oh please Jean: Check my clothes and look at my face. I highly doubt that the Phoenix would have cared if I had some clothes at all in her prison or even oxygen. There is no question that you have manipulated this here with your own powers." The man formerly known as Cyclops beamed.

And now Jean started to take a closer look at Scott's clothes, too. Yeah, she remembered that outfit: 'How could he...?' But fortunately (for Scott at least) before Jean could continue this memory, the whole dimension started to rumble like there was a small tremor.

"Let me guess, more good news?" Scott asked with hanging shoulders.

"It depends on the view, I think. The Pheonix is dead, and that's why this whole dimension is starting to be torn apart." Jean explained to him "You have to go now Scott"

"Forget it, Jean" Scott stated seriously "If you can't go with me then I am staying with you. And don't even think about kicking me out, because I would be back in no time."

This last sentence really shocked the redhead. This idiot would really kill himself? But she knew that he was serious about this – dead serious "What are you talking about? You can't just kill yourself! The X-Men need you! Your friends need you!"

"They will handle themselves. They stopped the Pheonix without my help, didn't they?" he snapped back. He was not going to lose this argument to her.

"Yeah they did. But there will me new threats. I got glimpses of the future through the mind of the Phoenix and believe me when I tell that we have seen nothing so far compared to the things that are yet to come." Another tremor shook the ground, far more powerful than the first one. "You know that the X-Men need a leader. And the Xavier-Academy needs a new headmaster. You know that Charles always wanted you to continuing his work. You have to do this. You owe this to them. And to him."

Scott knew Jean was right – like usually. Storm and Wolverine would certainly try their best but even these two couldn't handle all on their own and fill the gap the Professor had left behind with his death.

"And besides someone has to keep Logan in check so that he wouldn't molest the female students" Jean knew she had to hurry. If she couldn't convince Scott to leave on his own the danger was too high that he would do something to him. The third tremor had already the power of a small earthquake. 'Damn it Scott, hurry!'

"But I don't want to lose you again after I have finally found you Jean." Scott was whispering now, knowing that their little discussion was actual already over. He would have to leave Jean again; the third time.

"But this time we won't separate completely. Scott, please remember that I will always be watching over you, just like the Professor will." And before Scott could even nod Jean closed the small gap between them and kissed him one last time.

A kiss that was meant as a promise that none of them would ever be able to forget.

The new earthquake was finally to strong for the dimension and you could see that it began to crack on various locations.

"Are you ready", Jean asked as she broke the kiss.

"Nope, but I guess I doesn't matter." Scott said, but the slight smile on his lips told Jean that she had indeed succeeded and he wouldn't do any radical actions. "I will ever love you"

"I know Scott. Farewell" And with that she began to slowly transport him out.

Scott was already transparent when one important question shot through his brain. "Jean! Why is everything white here?"

"Because she likes this color. And I thought you would like to see it just once without your shades" Jean whispered softly, but Scott was already gone. Just like the little dimension, which had been created by the Phoenix. Because even the mighty level 5 mutant wasn't powerful enough to destroy the ties that have bound together those two. "Farewell Scott, I know you will have a great future... and thank you for naming your kid after me." And with that Jean Grey also known as Marvel Girl and one of the very first X-Men disappeared into air and travelled to an unknown area. And from there she would protect her Scott.

"Hello? You still alive down there?"

'Oh damn! My whole body feels like I have been hit by a truck. Where the heck am I? And why am I lying on the ground?'

"What's up with you? Are you mute or what's the problem with you?

'This voice. Who is this woman? Maybe I should just take a peek at her and... oh crap I lost my shades! If I open my eyes I will blast her.!'

"Oh that's why you keep your eyes closed, now I get it. So you got a name mutie?

"The name's Cyclops. And I would appreciate it, if you wouldn't walk in my mind without knocking."

"Handsome, clever and a retro nickname. Must be my lucky day. That means, if you call it lucky that I run out of gas in the middle of nowhere just to find someone lying nearby in the grass."

"Maybe it was fate, which brought us together"

"Yeah, sure. Like some higher force would be playing matchmaker for us mutants. I know I will regret this, but I think we should search together a way out of here. Unless you want to try your luck alone, Cyclops."

"I guess I will accept this kind offer, thank you Miss... By the way, what was your name again?"

"Frost. Emma Frost"


End file.
